Maya as soon as instructed me,
“I didn’t fall in love with him… I fell in love with the eye that lastly made me really feel seen.”
That sentence stayed with me for months.
As a result of her story will not be uncommon.
It’s the fashionable love epidemic no person talks about sufficient.
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HOW IT STARTED — “HE WAS EVERYTHING I EVER PRAYED FOR”
When Maya met Daniel, it felt like God Himself wrapped a present and handed it to her.
He known as her each morning.
Texted each hour.
Wrote lengthy paragraphs about how she was completely different… uncommon… a queen amongst ladies.
Inside three weeks, he had:
Purchased her items she by no means requested for
Talked about future homes, youngsters, marriage
Instructed her he had by no means felt this type of connection
Wished her obtainable each minute
Her buddies mentioned, “Ah, you don blow! This man dey worship you.”
Even Maya laughed and agreed.
However she didn’t know she wasn’t being cherished.
She was being studied.
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THE SHIFT — “I DON’T KNOW WHAT I DID WRONG”
The primary change was small.
He instantly stopped calling one morning.
Then he replied late—hours late.
When Maya requested if he was okay, he mentioned:
> “You’re too clingy. You need an excessive amount of. Settle down.”
She froze.
The identical man who begged for her consideration yesterday was irritated by her presence right now.
The worst half?
Each time she tried to speak about his habits, he flipped every little thing again at her:
“You’re imagining issues.”
“You don’t respect me.”
“I’m making an attempt—why are you attacking me?”
“In case you maintain performing like this, I’ll depart.”
And identical to that…
she began apologizing for wounds he brought about.
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THE CYCLE — AND WHY IT FEELS LIKE LOVE
Right here’s how love-bombing turns into a lure:
1. Overwhelm you with affection
So that you connect deeply.
2. Withdraw instantly
So that you panic and begin chasing.
3. Blame you for the withdrawal
So your shallowness breaks.
4. Provide you with crumbs of affection once more
So you’re feeling aid and keep.
It’s not love.
It’s emotional conditioning.
Your physique will get hooked on the highs and frightened of the lows.
Folks name it “loopy love.”
However psychologically, it’s trauma bonding.
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THE BREAKING POINT — “I FELT MYSELF DISAPPEARING”
One night time Maya cried to me:
“He doesn’t even do the issues he used to… however I maintain ready… hoping… begging for them to return.”
That’s the actual hazard of love-bombing:
Not that they depart rapidly…
however that you simply keep longer than it’s best to, since you’re ready to really feel the way in which you probably did to start with.
However the starting was by no means actual.
It was bait.
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THE HEALING REALIZATION — “THE LOVE WAS NEVER MINE”
When Maya lastly walked away, she mentioned one thing highly effective:
> “He didn’t love me.
He liked my response to his affection.”
That’s what love-bombing really is—
Affection used as a weapon.
Consideration used as manipulation.
Depth used to blur actuality.
Love is constant.
Manipulation is dramatic.
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IF YOU’RE READING THIS AND FEELING SEEN—YOU’RE NOT CRAZY
You didn’t think about it.
You’re not “too delicate.”
You’re not “exhausting to like.”
You had been conditioned.
Overwhelmed.
Pulled in.
Then punished for making an attempt to carry on.
And that’s not love.
That’s emotional exploitation.
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Picture credit score: Phát Trương On Unsplash
The put up Love-Bombing: When Affection Turns into a Lure appeared first on The Good Males Venture.